


Ghost and the Machine - Ouch Ending

by rebelmeg



Series: The Ghost and The Machine [4]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Assassins & Hitmen, Betrayal, Gen, Ghost Tony, Ghosts, Heavy Angst, Lies, Loss of Trust, Major character death - Freeform, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Regret, Secrets, Spy Bucky, Unhappy Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-04
Updated: 2020-01-04
Packaged: 2021-02-27 04:46:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,352
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22111294
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rebelmeg/pseuds/rebelmeg
Summary: The ouch ending toThe Ghost and The Machine!Written for my TSB square R3 - It wasn't worth it
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes & Tony Stark
Series: The Ghost and The Machine [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1550425
Comments: 8
Kudos: 26
Collections: Tony Stark Bingo 2020





	Ghost and the Machine - Ouch Ending

**Author's Note:**

> Go read the tags, honeybunnies. There's no happy ending here.

How long was he going to be able to keep this a secret, Bucky wondered to himself, looking down at the picture of Tony. How long until Tony overheard something, or started to suspect? It was getting harder every day to pretend he didn’t know who Tony was, he wouldn’t be able to keep it up forever.

Ever since he’d figured it out that first week, he’d been rationalizing keeping it a secret. He’d been convinced he was going crazy, that it wasn’t real, why would Bucky bother tell a hallucination that he had accidentally murdered him? 

But as more time passed, it was obvious he wasn’t any more crazy than the average CIA stooge. And every lie of omission left Bucky feeling more and more like he was betraying Tony in a huge way.

It wasn’t terribly unfamiliar. He had… killed a lot of people before. That was what he _did_. They could call him an agent, a spy, all they wanted. He was just an assassin. A murderer.

Half the time, he didn’t even see their faces.

He hadn’t seen Tony’s face.

But that hadn’t stopped Bucky’s bullet from killing him. He never missed. Not even on accident.

Scrubbing his hands over his face, Bucky leaned his elbows on the edge of his desk and tried to think his way out of this mess.

He had to tell Tony. He _had_ to. Before it was too late, before any chance that Tony might forgive him completely disappeared.

“Hey, Machine, what are you still doing here?”

Bucky’s eyes felt sore and raw as he blinked several times, Barton slowly coming into focus as he stood in his office doorway. “Hey. Just catching up on some stuff.”

Barton nodded as he came in and leaned his hip against Bucky’s desk, crossing his ankles. “That the Liechtenstein file?”

“Yeah.”

“You doing okay with that?”

Bucky thought he saw movement over to his left, but nothing was there when he glanced over his shoulder. “Why shouldn’t I be?”

Barton snorted. “C’mon, man. You killed a civilian. I know it was an accident, I know you know that too, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t weigh on you. I speak from experience.”

Bucky sighed. “I just want the whole thing behind me.”

“Can’t blame you there. Did you see the papers? Big fuss made about it, but with a name like Stark, that’s not a surprise.” Barton picked up the file, lifting Tony’s photograph to look at the death certificate underneath. “They put it out as a robbery gone wrong. He wasn’t even supposed to be there, so it worked out alright.”

Bucky nodded, not really tracking the conversation.

Barton tossed the file back on the desk, Tony’s picture front and center again. “Well, I’m headed out. You should too. You look like shit.”

Huffing a mirthless attempt at a laugh, Bucky nodded again. “Yep. Right behind you.”

Barton clapped a hand on his shoulder, then left the office and headed for the elevator. Bucky didn’t move, just kept looking at Tony’s photograph in the file, stalled out mentally and physically as he stared at the dead billionaire’s face.

“So… clearly you know something I don’t.”

With a harsh gasp, Bucky turned around, his heart thudding painfully in his chest.

Tony was… right there, right behind him, and it was obvious from the look on his face, his body language, the tone in his voice, that he knew. Had possibly heard everything.

“Tony, I… I…”

“Killed me, is what you did, apparently. But you know what, I’m strangely not really all that bothered by it.” His voice was cold, so cold, and it was drastically unlike the warm, talkative, live-wire person that Bucky had come to know over the past several weeks. “What I _am_ bothered by, however, is the fact that you have apparently been lying to me about it.”

Bucky’s mouth opened and closed, but no words came out. What could he possibly say? 

“You know who I am.” It was not a question.

Bucky nodded.

“You knew who I was. And that I was dead.” Tony was looking at Bucky with some kind of emotion that Bucky couldn’t, wouldn’t try to define.

“I did.”

“The whole time?”

He couldn’t seem to breathe. “Almost. A few days after.”

The expression on Tony’s face defined itself now without any help. Heartbreak. Betrayal. Hurt. “But you didn’t tell me. I’ve been going crazy like this, not knowing who I am or what I am or how this happened, and you _knew_ , and you didn’t tell me.”

“I’m sorry.” Bucky blurted out, panic and regret and guilt choking him. “I’m so sorry, Tony. I just… at first I thought I was going crazy, so why would I bother to tell you, you were just a hallucination, and then… it just got harder to tell you. I… I _killed_ you, Tony. I shot you, and I killed you, you’re dead because of me and it’s _my fault_. I just couldn’t… I couldn’t say the words. I can't believe I'm saying this, but I kept hoping that... I really was finally losing it. That you weren't real. Just a figment of my own PTSD. And I’m so sorry. I am _so sorry_.”

“Yeah. Not gonna lie, it’s kind of hard to believe that when every other thing you’ve ever said to me has apparently been a lie.”

This was a nightmare, Bucky realized, every nerve in his body sending panic signals to his brain, his heart pounding with dread and horror at what he’d done. Not murdering Tony, no. That part was bad. But lying to him. Because suddenly, that part seemed so much worse.

Tony had drifted away, staring out the window behind Bucky’s desk, his whole translucent body rigid as he folded his arms tightly across his chest.

“If I’m really dead, then… why am I here?”

Bucky shook his head, feeling despair closing in around him. “I have no idea.”

How could he have done this? How could he have let things go this far, and messed up so badly? He’d known better, even though his employment history would suggest otherwise. Tony was his friend, he should have… he should have done better.

He was trying to think of something to say, something that might make all of this seem less terrible than it was. He just wanted to fix it, to take back everything he’d done, every decision he’d made not to be honest with Tony, to start over again. But before the solution came to him, the situation was taken out of his hands.

Tony had turned around, and looked ready to say something, when it was as if the ghost kind of _flickered_ , something about him disappearing and distorting, but only for a moment. A strange expression was on his face, and Bucky suddenly felt like holding his breath.

“Huh.”

“What?”

“I wonder if there’s anything to the theory of ghosts having unfinished business.” Tony remarked, far too casually. “Something holding them to the mortal plane instead of going… wherever it is after this.”

“There’s something after this?” Bucky couldn’t help but ask.

“There’s… something.” Tony’s eyes went unfocused and he seemed to be looking up through the ceiling. “I don’t know what, but… it’s something.” He fixed his eyes back on Bucky, and it was heartbreaking how different that gaze was when there was no warmth behind it.

“I’m ready to move on. I don’t want to be here anymore. And I’m starting to think that whatever unfinished business I had is finished now.”

Tony looked slightly more translucent, suddenly, and Bucky’s entire body jerked in shock as he realized the ghost was visibly fading from view.

“No point in keeping myself here, I guess. If that’s what’s been going on. See you around, Barnes.”

“Tony, please, I’m sorry—” 

But before Bucky could say a word… Tony was gone.

Sitting back in his chair, utterly stunned, Bucky stared in shocked, horrified silence at the space where Tony had just been, feeling the panic close in around him.

What had he done?


End file.
